A set of unlikely coincidences

I went to Ocean Park again (for like the 4th time)... photos:

I love this snack... they are extremely thin and brittle biscuits with a hollow interior. it's somehow a source of calcium (for just 160 cals, the whole box... you get 15.1% of the daily intake), very crunchy, slightly salty, and 'light'. And very cheap! $10HKD for two boxes!






It was a pretty productive day. I was just gearing up to start working through a new assignment when I get an email asking if I would be available to take a call. Of course I was, I say to the person stationed halfway across the world. It takes a few calls on her end to get rid of a buzzing noise that we're both hearing, but eventually, everything is clear!

This conversation is super super important because we rarely get calls from them and I think they gave up trying to use email as there was a lot of back-and-forth with nothing substantial getting done, and I was eager to clear things up as quickly as possible. Another thing was, my reputation was on the line... I really couldn't afford to screw this up.

In the middle of the conversation, the phone behind me rings (1). It's very loud and shrill, and it's a communal phone, which means whoever is nearby and able should answer it. There are two colleagues sitting nearby who are conveniently deaf at this moment. The phone eventually stops. Then my own phone starts beeping and cutting the person on the other line off sporadically because a call was coming in (2). The communal phone behind me starts up again! Then, my cell phone rings (3), and I almost took the thing and threw it at my deaf (and actually kind of mute, since they didn't speak much) colleagues.

After I hung up, I viscously called back all the callers and got rid of them once and for all (cell phone one was a telemarketer) and all became quiet. Except I wasn't completely sure on what I was supposed to do.

That incident, I'm sure can be classified as 'life is throwing lemons at me' except I'm not sure how I can make lemonade.

Unibrow is everywhere

First of all, a disclaimer: I do not hate this person nor do I bear any ill will towards him just because he is balding and has a uni brow, and once induced a dream where I grew a uni brow and could not wax/pluck at it because I just had eye surgery.

Uni brow is my colleague. He shows up nearly every other morning in the elevator no matter what time I choose to head upstairs from napping on the coffee shop sofa/chatting half-asleep with my boyfriend. Sometimes I see him pop up in the hall after lunch or before I go. I don't understand this uncanny ability of his to be everywhere I go. I don't bump into my other colleagues with such astounding reliability.

If he merely said 'hi' to me, it would not be a problem to see him so often. But English is nowhere near his first language, so when he sees me, his mind goes into "red alert! immediately switch to English mode!" but he can't switch fast enough, so something incoherent like "mghhpghh???" spews from his mouth to which I respond with a curt "and good morning to you too".

In the afternoon, he will ask me one question that I don't think he actually cares about, but for the sake of making conversation, will ask: what are you eating? when it is clear-as-day that I am eating a chicken Caesar salad at my desk.

Very nice guy. Very polite, and a good scientist. Just makes me go -__-'' sometimes.


Life Updates:

- Apparently whales have songs of their own that travel around like a popular pop song. See article here: http://ecocentric.blogs.time.com/2011/04/15/how-whale-songs-rocket-to-number-one/

Listen to them sing here:

http://www.eurekalert.org/multimedia/pub/31370.php?from=183196

http://www.eurekalert.org/multimedia/pub/31371.php?from=183196

- I decided to fast from facebook for Easter.

- I celebrated finishing my dissertation presentation with nights of crocheting, and failed mochi (I was so disappointed that I forgot to take a picture). I was still in the beginning of my "be gentle with it, I didn't use any stitches" lecture when my student squeezed the angry bird after throwing it into the air a few times. I decided to take it back home to make some reinforcements before handing it to this child. I turned a rat into an owl (the ball of yarn was getting bigger than I had expected, and a rat of that size would have been a bit too scary.)

My beautiful hand-drawn cell, used in the presentation.

- A fashion and beauty magazine distributed very very pretty free octopus card holders, which was enough incentive for me to pick it up (also as entertainment during lecture since I forgot to bring my laptop). The very next day, I lost the holder along with the octopus card. I think it was stolen. It must have happened between me finishing lunch and returning within 10 minutes to scour the area around my eating tray (which was not picked up yet), to see a girl sitting directly in front of my tray, responding nervously and quite suspiciously to my inquiries.

- I went to pam's ocean-baptism at the beach. TRES COOL!! ~

- Three weeks in a row with long weekends!

"The fee for sitting in the booth without taking a picture is 100HKD" says the sign.

It's time for indian food again. This is starting to get routine.

The photo type on the far right is only $5 so I opted for that option in the booth (I mean, it was for making the ID of my chinese class pic) and I thought I'll just cut my face out. BUT, the options that were actually there on the screen were all very strange ethnic pictures of real people with their own faces cut out (the point was to put your face where theirs were). I wish I could show you the result of that but I am afraid I already lost the picture. I ended up paying $40 for a row of really really ugly pictures that turned out even uglier (my student card).
Ocean park pictures. This is becoming routine as well.


Yay, rides!

Encouragement

Yay, giant salad.

I made miss meow meow a dress.

Pin the parts on the chicken (game I used when teaching sunday school)
woohoo!! successful home made kelp salad. (it came in a bag in dried form)
My classmate went to China and brought me a souvenir. He said you eat each shrimp whole, as is.
Hello kitty floral arrangements

At my low point two weeks ago, I parodied 'i will survive': http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBR2G-iI3-I

first i was afraid

i was petrified

kept thinking i didn't have what it takes

to keep happy on this job

but then i spent so many nights

thinking how i did it wrong

n i grew strong

n i learned how to carry on

but it's back

from out of nowhere

i returned from the loo to find it here

with that email in outlook

responding to what i should have not have copied you on

if i had known for just one second

you'd be back to come after me

go on now go be your fuming self

just keep going now

fine i'll play your dirty lil game

i know how it works around here now

you think i'd crumble

you think i'd back off and leave

oh no not i

i will survive

as long as i have severence payment

i know i will stay alive

i've got all my life to live

i've got all my life to work

and i'll survive

i will survive

The stress (work--quite the long story, and school-- I was way behind schedule in my dissertation) has taken its toll on me in the form of excessive snacking as I tend to do when stressed, and cortisol, the hormone that compounds the effects of the former…. sigh. It will take me some time to get back in shape. Hot mexican buns are attractive when you're looking for a comforting convenient and cost effective treat.

At some point last week, I was unhappy and fearful about my career, but hearing stories about other people's hardships, and also the story of Joseph (as in Joseph from the Bible or Joseph and the amazing technicoloured coat of Webber's musical), reminded me of how life has a knack of continuing whether you like it or not, and that things usually get better. And I was reminded of how things could have been worse. And how it is in bad situations that someone can mature. Joseph, even while being kicked out of his family, getting jailed for no good reason; he stuck to his principles and did not blame anyone. The story goes, God pulled through in the end for him, reduced the crap that he could have been subjected to (ie he could have been killed instead of being sold into slavery), and used those crap experiences for a final extraordinarily good result. Even if you don't believe in divine plans, I think the same principle applies. Often we wonder why bad things happen. But it shapes our character, and sometimes the bad is necessary for a greater good that you only realize later down the road. From a christian point of view, believing in God doesn't mean you are exempt from farts in life and entitled to smooth sailing; it means leaning on God, staying true to Him through thick and thin, to his principles (Joseph didn't succumb to being depressed and whiney and justifying bad habits to his bad luck in life), especially in bad times, because He will take care of you.

So during bad times, examine your conscience, and examine yourself. Use this time to prepare for the good, because soon enough, it will come as long as you do your best and be patient.

Gluttony

Dim sum stacked sky high. My colleagues have a voracious appetite...
The eye drops after surgery.
From my boyfriend for vday : D
These are made out of soy powder. It's supposed to be 'healthy', but I doubt it... it's filling and tastes good though.
Cover of the packaging.
For my colleague, who flew off, and is now preparing to get married in India.
Gave this one to my boss.
More vday presents ^o^

Vday was very rainy and kind of cold, so our prior plans to spending the day walking around in the flower garden outside of disneyland was abandoned for spending the day at ocean park. It was on a whim. I don't see the logic in it either. However, it was fun and romantic, which is what's important.

As many of you know, I paid the pretty cheap fee to take tai chi lessons during lunch hour at my workplace, and have been attending since November last year.

One seemingly innocuous afternoon, after downing a sandwich in 10 minutes flat, I headed to my tai chi class a little late. As I scanned the room for a place to stand, I saw my colleague who face-vaulted, super shocked to see me (ie look like this o_O??!) and behind her, saw my boss, who made the exact same expression (O__o?!?!?!!). I felt like this (*o* whyyyyy!!!!?!!?) but looked like this ^_^ as I found a spot to do soothing breathing exercises, a bit haggardly.

That was last week.

Today, I have a headache. I also do not want to see boss. Today also happens to be tai chi day. And he joined into MY class, in the middle of it, just RANDOMLY (and said 'they should have lessons for beginners!').

As such, I have decided to hide out in the library to read CS Lewis' Screwtape Letters. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it. In addition to being highly amusing and easy to digest (each letter is short and to the point, with the most eloquent writing style), it really makes you think of how the devil slowly and obscurely leads people to hate each other, to engage in seemingly innocent little sins, be 'comfortably' away from those who need help, to be lost in the 'realities' of life that we lose sight of what's really important.

Today I reflect on yet another sin (well, in the 'catholic' sense that there are 7 deadly sins), 'gluttony'.

Gluttony, derived from the Latin gluttire meaning to gulp down or swallow, means over-indulgence and over-consumption of food, drink, or intoxicants to the point of waste.

Thank you wikipedia. When I read this, I first think of the high obesity rate in the world. I think of high fructose corn syrup and other really nasty things the industry comes up with. I think of the high rates of heart attacks and strokes in developed countries.

After awhile I think of immaturity. I wonder why we like to consume so much (or expensive luxurious food-also a form of gluttony)? I think it's biological to want to eat more or eat luxuriously (store up more fat = more energy = better survival), and we just lack self control to control ourselves or think of others. Eating is a good and normal activity of life, but like with all pleasures, if we abuse and pervert it, it becomes detrimental to ourselves and to others around us.

I took a brain test, and I'm frontal right! What does that mean? "harmonizing, rhythmical, supportive, sentimental, sympathetic" okay perhaps... but also apparently can't communicate well with numbers or words and instead resorts to linear abstractions. ?_?

Happy New Year!

They never met. Thanks to family arrangements, he called her, long-D call to HK from India. They spoke for 5 hours and mutually fell in love. The next day, they spoke for 7 hours. The following day, he proposed. Her mother asked if he was drunk. Since then, they exchanged letters every day. 2 months later, she traveled to India to meet her fiance and talk about wedding arrangements. This march, they will have their four-day wedding, attended by 500 guests. She will get a house from her dad as a gift, and will get another one from her future-husband.

This isn't my story (obviously), but my colleagues'. I'm retelling it because I think it's the best how-we-met story ever. It's like something out of a fairytale.

Now back to me.

It's 5 degrees above zero, and it feels like one of the coldest days in my life. Like the minus 30 degree day at Waterloo, where I stood there freezing to the ground while waiting for a bus. I think I gave up and went back into the house, and missed my group meeting--only it's

It's too cold to do anything but hibernate. Or do tai chi, which heats me up real quick!

Other than perhaps the weather, and the fact that there is a pile of work I need to get done (which I can do a better job at home than in my cold cold dreary windowless box of an office), 2011 has been good to me. I'm feeling something I haven’t felt in awhile—motivation. Work is not a problem. The problem is always psychological. Last year, my problem was lack of confidence in my abilities. And for awhile, the fact that getting out of bed was such a struggle. I love sleep; what can I say?

2009 was a year of rapid, exciting yet daunting change, in which I graduated and tried to find my place in a new environment. The patterns I set in 2009 laid the foundation for 2010. 2010 was not marked by changes. It was, however, to some extent even harder. New things is easy—sticking to them is hard. I wanted to quit my job. I wondered why I started school again. I even wanted a break from my student. I wanted stretches and stretches of holiday. And to just be able to wake up late for once. I was quite stressed, in a different way than I was back in University. But most of all, I was scared. I realized how small of a potato I was, and dismayed that there wasn't anyone holding my hand through it! None of that really nice jobmine-interview co-op system. Anyway, I was scared of work and mystery future work. And the pain in childbirth. And financial pressure, saving money, mortgage.

I was scared of growing up.

I realized several things about myself.

1 My personality is still changing, which is fine.

2 I'm still half-hazard in my approach to life, and that needs to change. I need to be more mature and take everything more seriously and pay more attention to what I'm doing.

3 I need to live in the moment. A harvard study through the iphone found that people are happiest when having sex, listening to music or reading. It's because people tend to be able to concentrate when engaging in those activities. People are happiest when their minds are not wandering, thinking about the past or the future. I think too much about the future.

4 I procrastinate and become a day dreamer when I face something difficult. I run away from my problems when I really should be facing them head on. I don't even realize I'm doing it sometimes, until I catch myself reading non-work related things like recipes or looking for new amigurumi patterns.

5 I'm generally a grateful and happy person although I like to wax depressing poetry over life. And there's no reason why I shouldn't be happy! I have the most amazing friends, great family, wonderful boyfriend, and God.

6 My dreams are still as weird as ever. (I dreamt of being in a falling elevator that turned into a bird in the end last night.)

Now it’s 2011. No explosive incidents at work, no accidents, and no careless incidents yet (well actually, one really close-call. I dropped my wallet but someone noticed and gave it back to me.) So I'm optimistic for a good year!!

I hope that everyone else around me will also have a great year.

Eye surgery update: so-far-so good!! No pain, no blurriness, no rings at night. Maybe it's psychological, but sometimes I feel like there's an eyelash inside my eye. Like INSIDE.

Documentation of ICL surgery

It is the second day after the surgery and I'm hermiting at home to avoid physically bumping into anyone on the street (likelihood = high in HK).

For anyone considering ICL surgery or are curious about it, here's the gorily detailed recount of what I went through. Excuse me if I sound less than smart right now or some of my sentences dn't make sense. Mental coherence is down from all the drugs and naps and meals. I've been taking naps every 4 hours or so since the surgery and then wake up for meals or to study out of a small sliver of responsibility left in me (then I'd crawl RIGHT back to bed after eating) So I've been sleeping a lot these days.

The surgery I went through is also known as Phakic IOL. IOL is introccular lens, which are typically implanted into the eye and replacing the natural crystalline lens. However, phakic means the eye's natural lens are not removed, so the lens (called: Toric Visian ICL manufactured in Switzerland) are placed right above the natural lens (sort of like an interior contact). In this case, ICL can be taken to stand for implantable contact lens. The material is collamer, a biocompatible copolymer (HEMA and benzophenone monomers), specifically purified collagen and water. It is foldable, so during the procedure, it is injected into the eye where it unfolds into position.

Why not LASIK or PRK? Because my nearsightedness is too much for those. I didn't have enough eye tissue to pave away at and reduce nearsightedness to 0. And I don't think those fix astigmatism. And they often cause dry eye symptom (I already have dry eyes). IOL is reversible if one day I need them removed.

Two weeks before the actual procedure, I underwent YAG laser iridotomy. A laser gun zapped the back of my eyeball to make holes near the edge of my iris (coloured part of the eye) to serve as outlets for fluid in the eye to circulate around the lens. Sooo painful. I think it was something like 3-5 zaps to make one hole, and 5 holes in each eye? I can't remember.

The next week I was all geared up to have the surgery, but my doctor said I should wait another week to let the occular pressure drop some more. In the meanwhile, I used a lot of eye drops. Disappointed, I went to work listlessly and impatiently that whole week! Then I watched a video of the procedure which I should not have done. There was more prodding and poking than I thought there would be. The brochure made it look so clean and quick!

On Friday, I went to work half day and headed to the doctor after lunch.

After a battery of tests, I was gowned and lay down on the operating table, fully conscious. They covered the rest of my face, dowsed my eye in what I believe to be iodine (yellow. what else?) and local anesthesia. The lights were turned off except for one, which I was told to stare at. I felt something, but nothing was painful. I saw fluids, and at one point, RED fluids, which was really scary.

How do people eat giant lollipops? I have a chupa chups in my mouth right now, it's only been like 3 minutes and my mouth is already tired from having to hold it there.

Anyway, I soon felt something really cold in the back of my eyeball. I think it should be the gel that allows the lens to slip in. Eventually, the light shifted positions, and I couldn't see it entirely. Pitch darkness. A short moment I saw it again.

Then "Surgery done. Successful." And the nurse ripped the cover off my face. Since there were adhesives there, it was painful. That's the most painful part of the surgery. The adhesives ripping off my face. I think the whole process took about 15 minutes. I opened my eyes and saw the crates of the lighting on the ceiling, with a bit of haze.

They left me there to rest for 20 minutes or so (doctor probably went to do another surgery during that time), and they came back for my other eye.

This time, it stung a lot when the iodine came showering down. I felt a bit of pain on the sides of my eyeballs this time. It was less comfortable (hah~ I'm using the word 'comfortable' to describe a surgery) but it took less time. Maybe 15 minutes at most?

Both eyes were covered, and I was led into a resting room where I was bored out of my mind for 30 minutes, and fell asleep for the next hour. I met up with the doctor again and the coverings we removed. Behold, I could see! The world was still hazy and swimming around, but everything was better than my pre-surgery eyesight already. My parents took me home by taxi.

*removes lollipop*

So I'm living a normal life now (two days after the fact) except for the fact that I can't take a shower for the next 4 days (and even then I have to wash my hair off a basin at a hair cutting place), take a normal bath (I need to wipe myself down), taking eye drops every 2 hours, and wearing eye shields to bed in case I claw at myself in my sleep, and taking more naps than a normal human being should.

*chucks half eaten lollipop in the bin*

I'm going to take another nap and listen to FF Distant Worlds II. I think this is some sort of personal record.

Merry Christmas!! Oh, it's still a bit early to say that...

Pride

I went to a free outdoor concert "Swire Symphony under the Stars". We sat on the ground, picnic style. Somebody bought a blanket and took a nap behind me. The theme was Russian music, with works by the likes of Prokofiev and Tchaikovsky. The evening ended with the 1912 overture accompanied by synchronized fireworks.

I feel listless and lousy this morning. I am getting irritated soley because my colleagues are talking loudly. It's terrible tuesday (I still cannot fathom why, but tuesday is the worse day of the week for me). I want to just take the day off.

My eye doctor told me that I should wait one more week before doing the surgery to let my eye cells 'stabilize' and 'balance' (I think those were the terms he used? but I have no idea what he means) and take more pressure-reducing eye drops. I was disappointed to hear that! The eye drops sting and I'm convinced that they are making my vision worse these days. Life is so blurry. And I was SUPER READY last week. Now I'm getting scared. The procedure is supposed to be fast, painless and easy, but the fact that I'll be conscious throughout the whole thing is unnerving. I also went an watched a youtube video, which I should not have done. It was a lot more cutting and prodding and poking than I thought. waaaahh I wish for Friday 6:00 pm!

I'm at work, obviously very bored if I'm here blogging, so I'll write another little rail on humanity, which I love to do these days. By the way, I bought a game. It is called 'fate of the world' and it is "a dramatic global strategy game that puts all our futures in your hands. The game features a dramatic set of scenarios based on the latest science covering the next 200 years. You must manage a balancing act of protecting the Earth’s resources and climate versus the needs of an ever-growing world population, who are demanding ever more food, power, and living space." http://www.fateoftheworld.net/

It's related to what I'm studying, so of course I felt compelled to play it.

I realized lately that humans covet what's not readily available. Like the developing masses of rich people emerging from developing countries who want to eat animals on the brink of extinction (it's going extinct?? then we must try it before it's gone!). We want diamonds, which are expensive because they are rare and not many people have it.

People often stop at nothing to satisfy their insatiable pride. Entire countries will go to war with each other (slaughtering many innocent people) because the opponent insulted them or somethng. They will build large machines and bomb each other into submission and display their 'power'.

Strange how that is considered to be 'cool'. The person who is ambitious and selfish is viewed upon favourably, whereas the ones who are desperate and humble are looked upon with disdain. This holds true for all walks of life. The 'average' person sitting at the reception counter, a lonely man looking for a girlfriend, the poor who wants some food. There is nothing glamorous about these people. Desperation is unattractive because it is implies lack of power and strength.

Actually, this one is really hard to write about. Pride is probably more than that. They say pride is said to be the sin of all sins because it is giving into the desires of the self. Satan in fact fell from heaven because of his vanity.